Today I was working out at the gym and as often happens someone was using equipment the wrong way. People are all shown how to use the equipment when they join up and the instructions are also easily seen on the equipment. So when I see someone doing this (using it in a way that doesn't work the muscles the machine is intended to use, and the good chance they will hurt their backs doing it incorrectly), I get very annoyed. I shouldn't, but I do. So when I saw someone doing this today I thought 'why doesn't this person do it the right way? Aren't they aware they shouldn't do it that way?' Then I caught myself and I said to myself 'don't be so arrogant about being right and someone being wrong'. Ack! But I should have just noticed I'd done it.
Lots of good breathing today! Got notices in evident places that simply say 'breathe'.
On reading some of the basic guide I found something that I'm quite sure applies to me... It was under The Six Realms -
The hell realm is characterised by acute aggression. We build a wall of anger between ourselves and our experience. Everything irritates us, even the most innocuous, and innocent statement drives us mad with anger. The heat of our anger is reflected back on us and sends us into a frenzy to escape from our torture, which in turn causes us to fight even harder and get even angrier. The whole thing builds on itself until we don't even know if we're fighting with someone else or ourselves. We are so busy fighting that we can't find an alternative to fighting; the possibility of alternative never even occurs to us.
This hit a nerve with me. For no apparent reason I've been quite irritable, easily angered, and quick to criticize for the past year or two (?) For many reasons from my past history I'm sure that the anger is anger at myself, not at petty things I let myself get all worked up about.
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